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TRUST ME I EMPATHIZE

I still remember this event that occurred in 6th grade and let’s just say it’s a quite a  few years since I graduated college so you can imagine how traumatic it was.  Six grade was an extremely difficult time for me because I lacked any true self confidence, was a bit immature for my age and was extremely messy. This was demonstrated in front of my whole class when my teacher dumped out my entire desk on the floor. Please note this was the time when you kept everything in the desk I just kept a bit more.  While the class laughed at my humiliation I decided at that moment that I would never be this sloppy again. I can’t tell you there aren’t moments when papers and items don’t pile up but now a day’s I’ll be the one who does the dumping and it will be in my own private quarters.

 I stared at my missed shot while the ball kept bouncing. This was how I learned what true self confidence was for while I looked at my missed shot and felt the world was laughing at me a friend who had missed five shots before demanded the ball to take another shot.  Didn’t he realize that same world was laughing at him? I had missed only one shot (it was way off) but he missed five how could he demand another chance shouldn’t he be embarrassed like me?  The truth is those with self confidence truly know how to take a shot or two or three and get back up.  They will not concede defeating even if a chorus of fat ladies is singing to them. It might appear as arrogance to some but when it works their mistakes vanish in air. My friend made the sixth shot and I believe won the game or at least in his head he did.

One further note this occurred in my junior year in college

It started in the summer of 1988 where life was full of romance and dreams of finding that special innocent beautiful young lady were burning in my heart who knew that this discovery would be found in NYC. For on that date a beautiful young lady from Nebraska entered my life which would lead me to a journey know Jewish boy from NY had gone on before.  After that night we went our separate ways but continued to keep in contact through snail mail and the occasionally telephone call then on Valentines Day she sent me a special gift and I knew I had to see here again.

I spent my vacation break in Nebraska to discover the truth of where this journey would end. We had many a laugh, enjoyed great steaks and even sang a song or two but in the end there was a distance that couldn’t be covered in miles. I left Nebraska telling her that the next move was hers all it would take was that one call. It was a call I was never to received and though it hurt it was a pain I was meant to bear. For if that call had come who knows I’d be growing corn in Nebraska today without the faithful journey I’ve taken which includes a lovely family in NY, a film that bears my name, businesses that have flourished under my direction and a faith that has held true.  You might have your plans but I believe that G-D has the true blueprint.

The more you clean, the more you clean until there is truly nothing left.  The truth as you clean you find messes that are hidden under the clean spot you’ve just made and it can truly drive you clean crazy. For example I knew a young man who would spend hours cleaning his car only to see those clean spots destroyed once it got on the road. It’s very important to be clean but like any obsession it can drive you to the the state of insanity where cleaning isn’t just a daily activity but the only activity. Therefore it’s best to have a limit of how much time and how clean you need to be within a daily time frame so you can still enjoy the messes that you create.

There appears to be a clear set of definitive rules for any occupation or sport that you might occupy but when it comes to being a parent those rules are hard to find. Let’s be a bit more clear the rules on being a bad abusive parent are fairly clear but to be a good parent that’ s an entirely new ballgame.  How generous should you be without spoiling your child? Is it more important to let your child struggle out of that situation or do they need a helping hand and foot?

The funny thing is even thought there is no clear rule book we can clearly see when a parent has hit that home run. Whether it be the parent that stays up endless hours helping their child recover from a bad cold, or a parent who will act with enthusiasm as they take their child to a movie they find annoying ; good parenting is as clear as a pane of glass. I guess they tried out a rule book in the past but replaced with love and caring instead. The great thing about being a parent is that although you might fail a quiz every once in awhile it’s a class (G-D willing) you get to take over and over again and like a good wine only gets better over time.