Lost art of “Tact”

Posted by Bruce - in Blog, Philosophy - 4 Comments

tact 2

There was a time when people were more careful with the words they used.  A time when people spent time thinking about how they would talk to someone before they actually spoke.  It was a time when people knew when to move on and/or shut the hell up (not tactful) instead of battle on nausea. I hope a bit more of this time is restored shortly.

Let’s be honest sometimes tact comes across as either a therapy lesson or political speak yet if done like an artist it can enable you to get your point across without engaging in a long drawn out battle.  It takes time and effort to figure out a strategy to enable this form of speech to work but many times it’s worth it. It all depends on how, who and when you use it (don’t use it in a locker-room or ballgame). Some people might resent the use of tact but most will appreciate the effort. Here are some key factors (below) to consider.

(1) Listen and try to fully understand those you will be using tact on. For example what is there point in there verbal attack, political position, etc. Try to figure how you can use their points to prove your point.

(2) Explain that you understand their point and how they feel.

(3) State clearly with (I) your position and why you feel that way. For example ” It can be hard but sometimes I feel….. when I hear this said and I become less motivated”.  This is where you utilize there points (step 1)

(4) Let the other person hear your words if they can or will.  If there is too much resistance move on.  Many times it will appear that they have ignored your point of view but you never know when your words of wisdom will hit them and make them think a bit differently.

(5) Be proud of yourself for being the better person either way and reward yourself with some very insensitive music and/or political incorrect movie.

Hearing voices but seeing nothing

Posted by Bruce - in Blog, Philosophy - No Comments

person on phone listening to radio

How many times in a day to we listen to we speak or listen to someone without actually seeing them? It could be the time we spend listening to a radio show while going for a long trip, that annoying telemarketing or a person from triple AAA helping you deal with a flat tire (yes I don’t know how to change a tire),whatever it might be it’s strange how much time we hear voices but see nothing.

Yet it’s how we perceive those voices that make life a bit more interesting. Does that voice come from a model hidden behind a telemarketer desk or a serial killer who just found out that your stuck with a flat tire; you may never know or know to soon. No matter how you imagine that person once you meet or see them in real life, it’s quite shocking that your imagination is so off (has anyone seen Don Imus lately).

The truth is how we see the voices in our life can tell us much about the type of people we are. If the voices appear dark and gloomy then maybe we are a bit more pessimistic then we should be on the other hand if their beautiful and sexy maybe we just want to escape the reality we are living in now. In conclusion maybe if we could change the way we perceive a voice we might be able to change the way we see the world.

To be honest…

Posted by Bruce - in Blog, funny - No Comments

Confused Yes I know you can’t believe it

What I’m about to say might be more controversial then my position on abortion. It might end friendship but the truth must be told no matter where it leads. I don’t enjoy fancy restaurants.  Wow that was a relieve!   A fancy restaurant is defined by me as any restaurant that serves main courses that are 30 times the price of a White Castle burger.  I have several logical reasons for my decision (see below) but there are occasions where I can make exceptions (birthdays, anniversaries, winning the lotto etc)

(1) PRICE- If a meals going to cost me alone $30- $50 I’d rather buy a new pair of sneakers.

(2) TIME- I would rather spend 2 hours watching a movie even a B movie then sit looking at the walls. Yes I understand these are very pretty walls.

(3) AMBIANCE- I don’t really understand what it means but it sounds too fancy to be in restaurant.

(4) SMALL TALK- After 10 minutes my small talk leads into the dangerous subjects of politics, religious or even worse Tim Teebow should be playing football.

(5) PRICE- Oh I said that before but did you actually look at what they charged for a glass of wine. I could buy an entire wine vineyard for that price.

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