Today is the first day I go on without my biggest supporter – my mom. A person who was truly there for me, even before I was born, and has been with me all along. Unlike other supporters, she didn’t tell me to pursue some “big goal” but gave me the advice to “make sure I had fun along the way.”
When I sought work as a paperboy, she strongly suggested I should enjoy my leisure instead, before I didn’t have that luxury anymore. When I ignored her advice and got the job as a paperboy, she insisted on driving me around to deliver the papers, if even the smallest cloud appeared in the sky (okay, maybe more than just one, but still!)
She made sure that I always had my favorite juice and vegetables through my growing up years as well. Mom was one who stood by my side as I battled everyone else in our family during often-heated debates or at least she told them to listen to me.
But the biggest thing my Mom taught me is that small things truly do matter, and small gestures of kindness can last a lifetime. My mom was wise enough to know that the little moments are truly special. One of my favorite “little” moments with my mom is when we saw the movie Alien together and we didn’t feel like eating anymore popcorn because of what could pop out of our stomach (spoiler alert!). Another one is that last special moment when we fed ducks; she fought for the smallest one to get a bite even though she didn’t feel well enough herself to eat.
While I will still try to change the world, maybe I can work a bit harder to make a difference in my inner world as well; that way my mom will never fade away. My memories and love for my mom will truly last a lifetime.
Mom, may G-D give you a resting place that is worthy of your dignity, grace, and love. I already miss my biggest supporter, and it’s only day one.
I spent way too much time trying to be with the “cool crowd” that I didn’t see the “more loyal” friends in front of me. Yes, these individuals might be a bit quirky, nerdy, strange or a combination thereof but they’re also loyal and caring while the cool crowd may only bring ice. They appreciate real friendship based on what’s deeper then the initial appearance and have a unique insight that can be fascinating and yes even sometimes a bit annoying. Even as I write this blog I know that my insecurities will continue to have me search through the ice but now I’ll keep a more open mind to those wonderful nerdy, quirky and/or a bit strange friends that I’ve taken for granted for too long.
IT WASN’T THIS BAD BUT IT SURE FELT LIKE IT WAS.
We all know about the different cliches that ran through our High School years the Jocks, Nerds, Druggies, Hipsters, Snobs and Cheerleaders but what if you didn’t belong to anyone of those cliches and were to go on a date with the hottest Cheerleader in your class? This occurred to me during a c. winter break from my college term. I tried to be myself but at this point I still was searching. We went to a fine dining restaurant and enjoyed some small talk but the awkwardness came to full fruition as the date was ending. It was the time for the goodnight kiss and I wasn’t sure which kiss this included. Would it be the polite kiss on the cheek type or being the au revoir type? Needless to say I was going in one direction and she was going in the opposite direction as did our lives after that night. If only I had a retake that night would have led me down a different path.
It was 1986 and two college students from Rhode Island decided to take a road trip to NYC that night to get tickets to the World Series. A World Series game that the Met’s had only seen since 1969. I know of this event because I was one of those students and that was one of the most incredible nights of my life!
What made it so incredible were the stars were in the right place for everything to fall in line. We had just made the last train going to Shea Stadium (it existed then). When we arrived at Shea Stadium the prices for the tickets were $200 each way above our price line and therefore we decided to walk to a bar to watch the game but just as the National Anthem was being played a scalper agreed to sell us tickets for $50 each. WARNING this was 1986 way before fine fake tickets could be made. It was the 6th game of the World Series and a game that teetered on the edge from sky divers in the middle of the field to a ball between a major league superstars legs this was the ultimate baseball experience. I may forget many things in my life but this event will be glued to my mind till my very last days