Whatever you might have thought of George H. W. Bush politics let’s all wish him a speedy recovery from his latest hospital stay for not only himself but our country as a whole. In times when we appear more divided then ever George H. W. Bush just by being with us, provides some extra dignity and unity. He has always showed respect for those after he left office and especially for the offices he held in a way our current crop of leaders should emulate. There were no boycotts of official governmental events he attended, while still having respect for others who strongly disagreed with him. George H.W. Bush may G-D grant you a speedy recovery for the good of yourself and the country which still needs your style and grace.
It’s a thin line knowing if a loved one suffers from mental health issues or is just having a moment. For we all can express our feelings with a bit more robust then normal but how can you tell when that line has been crossed and if treatment needs to be pursued? Furthermore how you can help if such an episode occurs?
There is always a trigger that causes a loved one to react but the type of explosion that occurs and the damages it results in is one of the ways. In the case of paranoia an individual will fill that one remark, look or small incidence turns their relationship upside down from good to evil. Where the person who has been the “actor” is now the villain and anyone who even associates with this individual has a dark side as well. In their mind the one suffering can only speak about the “actor” with the harshest of terms and is unable to communicate those feelings in any logical way to them. Rationality is thrown out the window and emotions is all that is left.
HELPING THOSE THAT SUFFER
(1) Empathize with emotions- The individuals logic is off course but the feelings they have are real and understanding them helps you get them through such an incidents.
(2) DON’T ARGUE LOGIC- It is a maze that you won’t be able to escape and only cause additional frustration.
(3) New direction- Stop if you can before you lose it and start a different discussion or do a different activity.
(4) Space- Give yourself a break and make some excuse (picking up Milk, walking the dog, doing some work etc) to get out until things calm down.
(5) Speak to Actor- This individual probably doesn’t even know that they’ve hurt your loved one so reaching out to them and telling them how said individual feels can help especially if the actor knows how to perform (not defensively) when they see or speak to them.
(6) Get them help- Even if you have to say that your seeking the help and want them to go with you it’s important to get them out the front door and get the help that they need.
(7) REMEMBER-Those that are suffering don’t understand what is occurring just like someone who has Cancer doesn’t understand what’s in their body at that time. Mental health treatment is like all health treatment it just occurs in a different part of the body.
This Presidential Election is not for the pundits but Twitter where sound bites rule and policy papers are what? For the public doesn’t appear to have the time or effort to truly explore the issues in depth of each candidate and would rather rely on the sound bites that hit them right away. “Make America Great”,”Winning”, are just a few phrases that Donald Trump uses at nausea but he isn’t the only one it’s just his quick phrases are sticking as if they were put on with crazy glue to the American people’s brains. Of course in elections pasts people used simple phrases “Morning in America” to catch the basic message of a campaign but then they’d go a bit more in the weeds to explore what it truly meant or at least consult their regular pundit for some depth today that doesn’t appear to be the case. Just remember “Having a Coke and a smile” may not actually bring your lips up so let’s find some time to make sure some of the sound bites have a bit more meat behind them before we’re left with only bones.
I thought I was creating a new type of therapy but “Drama Therapy” actually exists. Now it’s my job to try to expand this form of helping people. What better way to deal with your emotions and your reaction then practice them in the “artificial world”. This way when you feel overwhelmed in the real world you can learn how to deal with it better through the artificial experiences that you’ve gone through. It also is a therapy that allows you to let go of these burnt up feeling that can bring you down and hold you there. “Drama Therapy” could be the therapy that brings those who have difficult in this world the skills they truly need for success.
You may not own much but you own your emotions. Just like a mask you can take one emotion off and put on a new one when need be. Sometimes though that mask is very tight and it takes time, energy and awareness of the mask you’re wearing before it can be removed. We may say everyone else would feel this way but trust me there are plenty of psycho’s and people who look at the world differently that take in events with a whole different perspective. There is a time and place for all our emotions for even anger and jealousy can give us the impulse to act when need be instead of waiting for dire consequences. Here are a few pointers (below) to make sure you can pull off that mask of emotions instead of having someone else have to pull them off for you.
(1) BE AWARE– It’s amazing how we don’t take the time to observe how we actually are feeling and what makes us wear a different mask.
(2)OBSERVE OTHERS- Take the time to see how those you respect deal with events around them.
(3) YOURS- Understand that you are an individual and therefore your reactions to events are different then others. If you find certain events cause you to have a positive reaction then go in that direction even if the crowd is moving in a different directions.
(4) ACT- Find a way to demonstrate your emotional response so you can be aware of where it can take you and how to control it.
(5) PRODUCTIVITY- Are your emotions leading you to a path of happiness and hope or anger and despair? If it’s the latter please consider step 6.
(6) HELP- If you feel the emotions are taking control of you rather then you taking control of them get professional help so you can be in charge again.
It’s very easy to fall into a stage of paranoia when things appear to being against you from all different sides. It could start out with someone laughing at you for a remark you made and allowing that pain to be distorted on people around you. Maybe it’s a failure at work or school when other’s who’ve done “similar work” have pulled ahead that leads you to this painful detrimental path. Or it could simple be believing that others are leading a life of fun while you sit alone in a room. Whatever the cause it’s important to separate those feelings from reality before they cause major harm to the wonderful person you are. Here are a few ways you can stop the pain before it becomes to severe. If those feelings become to severe and take over then it’s time to seek professional help that can show you a different path that might have been hidden from your view.
(1) Talk to a stranger about an innocuous issue and see if they have the same reaction.
(2) Do or say something totally different from the act or words that lead you to these feelings?
(3) Listen or watch a “different show” to gain a unique perspective.
When dealing with someone who does something that you find objectionable for any reason there are ways to make them think about the act or just think angrily about you. “I understand how you feel and empathize with your reason I would just do it a different way,” might be the best way to approach such topics. You can then wait for the other person to respond to your comment or just leave it in the air till the next time you meet. The air can become thick and the person you’re speaking to you might become less defensive allowing you a better chance to have your comments be considered in the serious and concerned note that you bring them to him/her. This is not an easy approach especially when the act the person is involved in truly disturbs you but you must judge whether you want to vent or actually change that behavior or at least put the best foot forward.