Mueller Speaks to Congress

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Let’s be honest I’m in the “Anti Trump Camp” and for over 2 years I have spent millions upon million and with a team of those that truly hate the President but in the end we couldn’t find anything to prosecute him with. Trust me we looked under every mattress and prosecuted some of his biggest allies to get something that would stick but nothing really does.  Yes, we put innuendo’s out there which you could grasp at but you know it’s probably stretching a bit too far for the public. I’m truly sorry I didn’t fulfill the deep states needs but we couldn’t make up a crime even as we did try. Any questions?

FOOTNOTE- Honesty would be great …. even if it’s just a dream.

Tesla Exemption

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If you own a Tesla you should have an exemption that allows you to drive as fast as you want. For the speed limits were designed because speeds over 55 mph were shown to waste more Petroleum then speeds under that amount. The Tesla and other 100 % electric vehicles are powered by electricity which can be deprived from many different sources but not gasoline directly.  A matter of fact if such a waiver was adopted there would be a boom in the purchase of said electric vehicles reducing our demand on petroleum products like never before and boosting sales of American made care. Therefore let’s change the road map and give Tesla’s owners the speed they deserve faster and better then the rest.

FOOTNOTE- Of course reckless driving such as weaving in an out of lanes and not permitting enough car distance between said cars would still be ticketed.

A Wonderful Difference

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I was loyal to my Keurig machine until the 2nd one broke down and decided that maybe it was time for a new cup so I purchased a Mr. Coffee version of this machine. Yet before you condemn for going with a copy I want to tell you about some unique features (below) that allow this coffee machine to earn it’s Mr. title.

(1) Strong Brew- When you need an extra pick up this machine allows you to have it.

(2) Size- You have options again on what size coffee you are making.

(3) K Cup or Ground- Another feature which gives me options that a Keurig machine just doesn’t have.

To conclude Keurig might have been first with K Cup type coffee but Mr. Coffee deserves it’s place in this race.

Fear of G-D

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I believe that many people have left their faith or never got on the train because of fear. They fear that by being faithful they’ll have to do or not do things that they would otherwise enjoy, if they lack such faith. To them it feels as if the prison walls are closing as everyone else is walking free.  Let’s face it obligations and responsibilities can feel like a burden maybe that’s why people have cats as pets instead of dogs.

Yet fear of G-D also opens up new doors that others who lack the faith have closed. For we don’t fear death as much as living for a higher purpose. That gives us  freedom from the chains of a P.C. culture that continues to tie many people up. It allows us to be who we are and not to worry we aren’t meeting everyone else’s goals just one above. I guess in the end it’s how one looks at a faith that determines how free they will be with or without it?

Water Coffee

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Your water is too bland and your coffee is too strong then it’s time for WATER COFFEE.  This will be the one water that will give you the taste to keep you going for me.  It will have a hint of the delicious flavor of coffee yet without the bitter side effects. WATER COFFEE because water deserves to taste more T-H-R-I-L-L-I-N-G!

Alone In House

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POLICE OFFICER- So you’re saying you never heard anything? You were just alone in the house

BRAD- I heard things but I usually got home late at night and thought maybe I was imagining it.  I’ve had some mental health issues and….

POLICE OFFICER (Yells) There were satanic rituals occurring in your basement with chanting s and burning s  and you want us to believe this bullshit!

BRAD – (Crying) I’m sorry I thought it was a dream it’s a big house and I never really went downstairs except…

POLICE OFFICER- Except that night when you finally had enough and that is when you saw the blood splattered everywhere and nobody else was there.

BRAD-  There were those grotesque bodies and that one person who stared at me with the bluest of eyes from deep into the woods.

POLICE OFFICER-(YELLS) So you want us to believe they used your home and you never knew.

BRAD- Yes, I thought I was alone in my house.

Good Friday?

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WARNING- This is not meant to offend my Christian brothers and sisters but just open up a discussion.

Why is Good Friday good? I understand that the Christian faith believes that Jesus death was a way to cleanse the world of all it’s sins but it’s still a death.  My  Jewish faith on the other hand mourns all deaths even those of a martyr so it’s hard for me to balance this question.  It’s also more tragic a death when it’s someone you truly feel plays an important role in your life. Maybe the holiday should be changed to Bipolar Friday for your sad that Jesus died but you’re happy that it wipes away your sins. Just a thought from a friend of the Jewish Faith. Either way may my Christian Brothers and Sisters have a truly Good Friday with much happiness, health, inspiration and love.

Telemarketing Affair

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Karen I read through your script and know you really just want me. For you keep calling me back even after as I have continued to  hang up on you.  At this time you must understand that I don’t want a college loan for I didn’t even go to college but you’re relentless.  Yes, some might say you’re just a recorded voice but I can feel you want me to push your buttons. We have some secret affair that is going on and I finally figured it out. So the next time you call I’m just going to do it and press 1 for more information. I can tell these are the facts that I’ve been waiting for my telemarketer lover.

FOOTNOTE- This is not a true story but I’m sure it is occurring in a lonely hotel near you.

Woke or Asleep

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I think I’d rather be sleeping then be “woke”. For I can dream of a day when we all could truly be ourselves without the warning lights of the PC police. A day when a word or two would not cause you to be silenced forever.  The dream would include laughter at words that were truly meant to be jokes not tears of indignation. This would be a day when the 1st amendment was protected by all not continually scratched by those offended.   Yes, sleep sounds just right until I wake up to such a day again.

Mueller Report- REVEALED!!!

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After a secret analysis the hidden roots divided by the derivative can show how the Mueller report fully and completely indicts President Trump on colluding with the Russians. It’s just a matter of calculus to the  10th degree which is something any Harvard Professor of Mathematical Equations could explain to the public.  Of course many of lesser abilities won’t be able to understand this clear straight formula but since we discovered it then it must be true. Of course if you decided to formulate this analysis utilizing the 9th or 7th degree the result let’s say might be quite different but who is really counting and what is the answer we need to get to anyway.

 

We can