GETUP

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Toilet Seat

Do you know people who love this seat (above) too much? They feel like it’s truly their throne which they can’t be taken off. Well for those individuals it’s time for GETUP a special toilet seat that you program with a preset time  so  know one will be able to ignore

when their time has expired. ThisAlarmalarm with have all the bells and whistle attached. That’s right your toilet seat will tell those extended sitters all the things you wanted to say to them but didn’t want to get this close.  A matter of fact if they decide to ignore the first alarm well maybe a bit of buzz will shake them up to realize there’s no escape except outside the bathroom door. GETUP for toilet’s are  for sharing not hogging.

FOOTNOTE- Water hose may be an added attachment.  I want also thank P.A for helping me formulate this brilliant and cruel idea.

Barbara Bush-RIP- The Original

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Barbara Bush

Barbara Bush 3

Barbara Bush was one of a kind and that’s why we as a nation loved her. She had her own way of looking at things including the way she looked. This proud woman was not afraid to stay gray and say what she really felt even if it ruffled a few feathers.  Yet most importantly she was a woman who kept her family together through good and difficult times. RIP Barbara this nation will miss your strength and character as not only a fabulous first lady but a wonderful person.

What If?

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Thinking 6

Sometimes we live in “what if’s” instead of actually living.  We worry too much about our next step that we forget to walk ahead.  Yes, it is true we might fall but it is better to have fallen then to have stood still for at least you have somewhere else to go.  What if’s can stop you being with the person that you could love as said better then I can by this following song below. Which begs the question “What If” they thought too much about this song we probably would never have heard it today.

[youtube_sc url=”https://youtu.be/fM8V1XOI-14″]

Your Touchdown!

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Touchdown 4 Touchdown 3

It was the blizzard of 1988 or so and everyone was ready to stay inside but me and my friends decided to play football instead as I caught the pass that had me running for the touchdown.  This was probably a score I never would have had in real time because I wasn’t the fastest game in town but the elements helped me then and they can help you now.  For today you will score your own touchdown(s) although the crowd and fans may not know it.  You will work to achieve some incredible goal and finally get over the “figurative” goal post to achieve it.  The ball may not be Pigskin and your field may not be grass but you will have made some great achievements that only you could have done at the moment. So go ahead and do your touchdown dance you might get a few looks but you won’t get penalized for the celebration.

Dog Trained

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dog doing housework 1 dog doing housework 3

I want my dog trained to not add to the mess but help eliminate it. Who really cares if your dog sits I’d rather have them sweep instead.   I can only imagine if my dog was able to perform one of these tricks (video below) for it would save me time, monies and would truly be fun… for me.  For now they can just stay cute but it’s always good to imagine.

[youtube_sc url=”https://youtu.be/PztO-OvzRyg”]

Fig Newton- GUTSY

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Fig Newton 2

It was a completely gutsy and even rebellious move to introduce the Fig Newton to the marketplace. Imagine the day this brilliant person came out with this idea of putting Figs in cookies and the reaction “FIGS IN COOKIES”?!!.  Who would think anyone would want this as a dessert treat?  Yet this person believed in this enough to introduce it to the marketplace and for over a 100 years we have been delighted with their guts.

 

Fig Newton

Sean Hannity- Michael Cohen-Liberal Throw up

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Sean Hannity 1

I started reading what I thought was going to be an insightful piece on why it mattered that Sean Hannity was the 3rd Client of Michael Cohen but I became nauseous half way through.  Issac Chotiner did an incredible hit piece on Sean Hannity as if he wore a white robe and burned crosses. There was not one actual fact but plenty of “assumptions” to destroy Mr. Hannity’s character.  Even an opinion piece should be somewhat based on facts not just hate.  Mr. Chotiner if you believed your piece would close the doors on Mr. Hannity I and many millions of other deplorable’s will now open it more widely

Kick these Illegals Out…. We all agree

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Police Round Up 1

We all agree that there are too many of their type in our country already. That these illegals need to get the hell out of our country now!  For they didn’t come here with any legal passports or any documents and basically just flew over our country.  They produce nothing good for our country and can be violent if we get too close. What’s most disgusting is the mess they leave behind and how many offspring they have.  They’re invading our country and before we know it they’ll take over if we don’t stop them now.  These creatures (literally) coming from our Northern border must be stopped and if a wall is necessary then let’s build it but I’m pretty sure it won’t work.  CANADIAN Geese it times to go home!

Love what Hate

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EXCITED ANNIMAL Food Shopping

Can I go, can I ?!! I’m excited about an activity that most other two legged people hate food shopping.  I love to see the variety of items that are stacked so neatly on the shelves. Not to mention the new items that get me dizzy with excitement.  The grocery stores love me as well for even I’m going just for Milk some how my cart is full with all the items that go with it even Pickles and I’m not pregnant… I think.  Grocery shopping it’s so much fun for me … not you.

Just As Excited

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Donald Trump 10 hillary-clinton-smiling  Steve Martin

The key to life is to be just as excited to say the same thing even if you’ve said a hundred times before. Yes you can make America great,  I know how, or just being some wild and crazy guy as you say as if it was the 1st time.  You may build your wall to the point it’s already  been memorized but it’s got to sound as if the first brick on the wall. So have your catch phrase but make your audience feel as if they caught something new even if the ball is old and tethered.

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