I had planned in my mind a conversation that included all Y’s and spoke in a warm tone but all they heard were harsh X’s. For from the moment my mouth opened their perception of what I was going to say was already made up and they would only hear the words that went with that perception even if they weren’t actually said. If this happens way to often in your life maybe the question should start such discussion. For when you know where someone is coming from then maybe you can lead them down a different path or at least know your path is somewhere they can’t go for now. I’m going to try that approach next time even if it requires more listening and empathy then actually talking.