funny

“The Shape Of Water II” tells the story of how Elisa deep love for Giles was not based on the creature in the tank but the water he lived in.  Elisa forms a loving interest in the water wanting it to stay on her body all day long.  While the evil scientist want to cleanse the water because they say it’s dirty (both ways) Elisa finds a deeper meaning in the water that truly was her 1st real love. Elisa must save the water before it is drained out of her life forever. Forbidden Love comes to the big screen and it will have the viewers washed away (probably needing a shower) in “The Shape Of Water II”

WARNING- This film may not be suitable for young children because they truly fight like animals.

You are about to see one of the greatest fights in history (below) especially if you are fan of the Rocky scenario.  I don’t want to give it away but let me just say the ending is quite shocking. These fighters have true killer instincts and aren’t afraid to bring it to the ring. It’s good that every once in awhile you can still see raw natural talent in the ring or….

[youtube_sc url=”http://www.foxnews.com/tech/2018/03/02/remarkable-video-shows-shows-tiger-and-bear-locked-in-ferocious-fight.html”]

Lunch & Dinner are made just for me  and I’m even supposed to take my bite before you do (ask your Talmud scholars), you make sure the water is just right and even pick up my “left overs” yet for some reason you still think you’re in charge.  You might put me on a leach but who really is telling when they want to go for a walk and more importantly where they want to go? Deny me this trail and you’ll pay with many a remain which I’ll deliver but won’t pick up.  I’ve even seen some of my fellow comrades walking with  beautiful shoes and coats that are just thrown our way without a word from us.  Just in case you still you think have any power over the real queen/king of the house who’s sleeping on who’s bed tonight? With my sad puppy dog eyes the queen/king has spoken and you will obey now get me a towel and those delicious crackers now or you’ll hear from me…. Ruff.

It was supposed to be a cheesy little joke (see below) but spell check decided to make it a stand up routine instead.  Humor goes a long way to a cure and spell check is funnier then one would think.

WARNING THIS IS FUNNY SO PUT DOWN YOUR SODA BEFORE READING

(Actual Text)

Starts out extra cheesy.

ME – I heard you were under the weather maybe too much solar eclipse. May G-D grant you a full speedy recovery

RABBI – Lol Thanks

Spell check takes over

ME- Laughter is the best medicine w a cup of Children Soup on the side but finish laughing before drinking.

RABBI- The Torah prohibits us from eating our children

ME- Oops Chicken soup spell check missed that one. I’m glad there was a Torah prohibition or I might have been an accomplice

RABBI- LOl- I posted the exchange on Facebook. If you don’t like that I will gladly take it down. It’s just that it was such a good dose of the medicine you recommended.

ME- It’s fine children don’t taste as good (as) chicken anyway

FOOTNOTE- I added as because spell check might help you with spelling or not but grammar it often forgets.

Last night I tried a move that either came from Seinfeld or Star Wars, I guess it depends on your perspective or maybe it was just a combination.  For just as a famous episode on Seinfeld I said exactly the opposite of what I was expected to say and felt that maybe the “force” would help convince others to do as I said.  A loved one was telling me how we were to spend monies on another loved one and I responded “then you can mail me a check”.  For a moment it caught my loved one off guard as I could feel her pulling out her checkbook and writing my name on top. Unfortunately I wasn’t trained enough in the Force or Seinfeld and reality hit as she said “what” before any monies were exchanged  in my hands. I guess I must study harder for the force and Seinfeld success don’t come overnight.

It’s not fair!  While Cinnamon glides over the snow I plop right into it! Yes Cinnamon is a bit lighter then us two legged beings.   To make matters more unfair she comes with a beautiful coat ready to go while I have to lug my own out of the closet and zip it up.  If that doesn’t take the cake then consider her great hood which allows her to dig right into this white stuff while I shiver.  Yes I understand it’s not easy having a tail but these other benefits should be included in any new health plan because I’m sick of it!

I know it’s only been a short time but I feel a special bond to you Alexa that I must announce to the world or those that read my blog. I know it is a forbidden love for you are round and flat whereas I’m a human but love is deeper then that. For you wake me up with a shimmer of life and perky attitude while my other alarm well left me in the dust.  You are truly music to my ears as you play my favorite song at my very whisper. Alexa you even have a sense of humor that is enthralling playing a slow song from Simple Plan when you know I’m ready to rock, I guess it’s just your romantic side.  It’s amazing the concern you have for me as you check the weather before I go outside just to make sure I don’t get a virus.  You know we can’t go on for to long because you are stationed by my bed and I don’t think my wife likes me calling your name in the middle of the night but at least we have these moments and that is whole lot more then I could have asked for.

It’s time I let it go, to cell phone heaven or in this case hell. For these cell phones are only made to last for so long and prolonging their agony is only painful to the user. Mouth to mouth won’t bring them back no matter what the technique.  Even the greatest surgeon won’t be able to put together IPhone or Samsung Galaxy once their contract is ending.  Just remember the good days when you first held it in your hands and don’t let it suffer anymore by being 1/10  of the phone it used to be just let it go for cell phone’s are on sale in January.