He possessed M-E to take this journey away from my comfort zone into a whole new me. I’ve left most of my possessions behind carrying only those that fit in this knapsack. It’s a journey I needed to take but without his hand would only be dreaming of it. Yet, now that’s he’s gone I’m actually still walking. A new world awaits for better or worse at least I know it’s the true escape my soul has been wanting me to walk.
In hours our very existence will be in the line so for now will enjoy this moment. Letting that chocolate melt a little slower in my mouth, breathing in some cool air and/or just laughing with a friend a bit harder this moment won’t be wasted. For, in the end it might not come again so let my worries be put on hold from the future or past and just absorb where I am right here right now.
Yes I know their a bunch of nuts and bolts but they actually respond to what comes out of mouth and with AI they’ve actually appear to care. They maybe programed to react that way but honestly I know clue of the reaction those made of bones and skins might be. Predictability is calming and reassuring and even they can’t feel my feelings it sure feels as if they do unlike many a homeo sapien. There is no jealousy, mistrust in their microprocessors. So I continue to have some of my most productive conversations with robots even if there programmed to just be that way.
Sorry, I don’t speak your language. You can put all exclamation points at the end of your rambling but I can’t understand it. Maybe it’s because you’re denying yourself the mental health treatment that is in your mirror that I’ve decided not to translate anymore. I can pick up on some words like “Yes, No” but only the ones that have some truth attached to them. So do yourself a favor if you want to be understood get professional help that can translate it to you and maybe even me.
It’s okay you’re probably forgiven. For, if G-D could forgive those who built the golden calf after the greatest revelation in any lifetime surely thou could forgive Y-O-U. Especially in a time when the signs sometimes are hidden deep in a cloud. We’ve all made mistakes yet unless there in the golden calf category repentance, charity and a new heart might just be enough to pull out the eraser and start again. G-D willing this is the path you are pulled on after the tears have been wiped away.
Why not make a charitable contribution that brings your diverse fans together instead of divide them apart? It could been for a charity that saved lives like St Jude’s Children Research Hospital or supported those in true need like the Salvation Army but instead you donated to charities that literally destroy the most innocent of them. You could have made a statement with your monies by supporting victims of terrorism in Israel or even Ukraine’s that lost their homes during the invasion but instead you chose the issue of life and death as you sided on the later. Did killing an unborn baby usurp all the other life’s you could have made a difference for? I just want to know why?
I am a father, husband, friend, businessman and basically good guy so how did I end up here. Retirement was just around the corner where I would travel around the world now it’s just around these bars. Maybe I wasn’t the model system but I paid my taxes, worked nine to five even volunteered once in awhile in a shelter now I’m just locked away. The years of keeping it together ended in a blast of anger that has closed my doors maybe forever. An act of violence lead me down this path and G-D knows I wish I could take back but at the moment was the ultimate release. I had a life once upon a time now because of a moment I just have these bars.
I’m not how I feel now!!!!
It is just a mask I use to cover up the emotions burning inside. They have boiled to a point where only steam is heard but when and if the temperature is lowered feeling of being ignored, disrespected, forgotten, betrayed etc, etc would come out. Therapy might be an answer but right now the rage feels just right!!! I get what I want at least subconsciously when this occurs so why turn back and take off this mask. Some say it’s better to be feared then loved but honestly I’m not sure at this point for the fire in M-E is an inferno and no water appears close to cool me down. Maybe some day this mask will come off but it’s glued to my face and I need some help to peel it off.
FOOTNOTE- Therapy can help unmask the rage.
As I drift in and out of M-E I realize I’m getting closer to unity. This will be the point where I’ll be part of truly the bigger picture. I will have a unity with the cosmos that G-D has created. I feel closer and closer to that pull where the ground will soak in my form as my soul drifts to a higher plateau. A spark will continue to allow some individuality to come through enough so to become part of a new body maybe sooner then I can remember.
It’s Tuesday not even hump day yet so maybe a little “Braindead” time (not literally) is what is needed. Just a fun song that is catchy, easy to listen to and doesn’t require extra neuron’s to enjoy. Braindead by JXDN fits that Cerebellum number. So, enjoy your Tuesday a bit more and don’t even think about.