Guaranteed Dating Service

Our service guarantees that you’ll meet you’re special person from the 1st date or we’ll  give you a double refund.  A person who will find you delightful to be with from the moment they set eye’s on U.  We can’t guarantee it will last but when …uh I mean if it ends they’ll be a really powerful reason (deported, prison etc).  How can we make such a bold statement well let’s just say we have the resources to make dates come true.

SMALL PRINT- Part of the monies you pay for this service will be to hire a “professional person” who will insure a fun evening for you without your need to know.

FOOTNOTE- This isn’t true…maybe. It also would make an interesting film.