The arguments couple’s or friends get into are based on divergence from the reality they expect to be in. You might be friends or lovers with someone who is soft spoken so when they yell it hurts more then from others. There are those who live life carefree except when it hits them all and of a sudden they expect the world to be fraught with their drama. We might put up with the nagging of a friend/lover because of the other resources they bring to the relationship but then when those are gone what is truly left? If we can build more colors to that relationship maybe the reality of their other actions won’t be so black and white and/or hot and cold.