“Calm Down”, “It’s not so bad” are just two phrases that have the opposite effect on a person then they were meant to be. Expressions such as these show no empathy to the person going through a problem and only make the person want to explode faster and with a bigger bang. Yet many continue to use such expressions not because they understand but because they don’t. Therefore if you are truly to calm down things throw off your shoes and walk around the person who is intense, hopeful then you will feel the pain and speak in a way that shows it.