My Funeral

Posted by Bruce - in Blog - No Comments

funeral

I know this is a morbid conversation but after listening to a funeral from outside (Kohen’s couldn’t attend) I realized it was a conversation I should have before.  Here (below) are some of the points that should be included.

(1) 2 HOURS OR MORE- No person should feel rushed to give a Eulogy because there is a body (literally) right behind.

(2) BIPOLAR- It initially should be sad but as the service goes on it should on a happier note knowing that I’m in a better place (G-D willing)

(3) MUSEUM- Many pictures, thoughts and items of my life should be displayed throughout the funeral, Shiva call and even at a small permanent memorial.  These items should inspire others to keep those dreams alive that I couldn’t achieve in this lifetime here.

(4) FOOD, MUSIC, & FUN-Depending on Kosher law there should be a smorgasbord of some of the items I’ve enjoyed here for my loved ones to enjoy while I’m away.

(5) COFFIN- Save your monies on these expenses (my soul is getting the heaven out of there G.W)  and just have a dignified Stone where I’m buried.

(6) KOHEN-There should be a private air condition/heated room (depending on the season) for Kohen’s to listen to and hear the proceedings of the funeral without violating their faith.

(6) ANNIVERSARY-It would be great if there could be a yearly anniversary of my passing in which monies are raised for some of the charities that touched my heart when it was beating.

A final note although I won’t be here during this period I hope to leave some monies to achieve these goals long past that period and who knows when I’ll drop by and haunt you if they don’t occur.

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