Author Archives Bruce

Don’t Y-O-U remember I was in your feet just a lifetime ago? That’s right I was the one with two and you were the one with four.  The bond is still there just in a different body. I was good too Y-O-U in those days but nothing compared to how you are too M-E today. The problem is there is no way I can communicate this truth too you as I speak in Bark in your in English.   Trust M-E your kindness will be reciprocated plus if this story changes again and our bond will even be stronger …that’s if I remember.

While chaos surrounds every corner of my being, walls from the inside allow for peace. For I am making an extra effort to build these walls brick by brick so negative thoughts don’t come in and even when there are cracks ice them out before they would take hold. I can not control the chaos that others bring to my table but I have to make a greater effort of staying strong at least from the inside out.  This doesn’t mean keeping my cool at all times but not letting it stay for free in my head. Being who I am is harder when the world around you is making so much noise that is why the wall of inner peace must be maintained no matter what!

I need to get away and they’ll pay to have it done. For, even if they treat M-E poorly would they actually not pay a few dollars to let me “live”?  Yes, then I will really live with my kidnapper taking a cut while I escape this toxic life I’m stuck in. It might seem wrong but you haven’t had to deal with what I have had to with no papers signed for my escape this was the only route I could take. I loved my country but with the money they’ll send to have me “live” I’ll truly do so maybe in Mexico instead.

I miss Y-O-U today as I must run. I’d love to give new insight, provide a funny perspective or just be authentical M-E with Y-O-U but can’t as I must run early to work. I could be writing the piece that changes your life today but unfortunately I can’t because I have to be there extra early and if I started writing I don’t know where it would ….

We mourn the loss of Jessie Jackson for his loved one and those who have been touched by many of his words. He was an important civil rights leader for the time.  Yet we shouldn’t forget that he was one who created a deep division between those of the African American community and those of the Jewish faith. It wasn’t just a word or two that he could later apologize for but pushing policies that would be harder to forgive. Jessie Jackson also funded his organization “Push” through threats to various businesses of boycotts and pressure campaigns if they wouldn’t pay.  It’s important that we look at the whole picture of Jessie Jackson and I’m sure that most outlets will be pushing the “good side” as if he was saint.  May G-D allow him though at this time to rest in peace even if it’s a bit more bumpy to get there.

“Roofman” is not just a movie but a way of seeing the world. Where many try to divide the world in deep black and white lines “Roofman” shows there is much gray in-between. Yes, people do bad things and deserve to be punished accordingly but for others they see a completely different image. It’s as individuals have their own coin to be flipped and many see only the heads or tails without looking in between.

****- Roofman hits the moments that keep the viewer entertained throughout.

My name is…. and I’m an addict. I know what I do is not good for M-E but it still stays in my mirror. Somehow I think this will be my last time but keep falling down that rabbit hole. I have days maybe even weeks where I’m completely clean and feel I’ve conquered it only to feel the pain 24 hour later that I’ve failed myself. Maybe it’s because I get such a high being wanted and fixing things that I studiedly believe this one can be fixed but no it will truly take a miracle. Yet if I can just through this one I know … nothing.  I’m an addict and toxic relations is my poison.

Please don’t leave me like everyone else has. I know this side of me is difficult to deal with but it will pass if you can just give it time and I can somehow interrupt that you’re truly there for me. Words and actions will be taken to make you believe I want you to disappear but that is just a coping mechanism I’ve created to deal with pain from the past, present and future. It doesn’t make sense for one that doesn’t want to be alone but I put myself in this drowning water because somehow I feel I will be abandoned again. Don’t leave me know matter what a message from my subconscious.

I’m stupid, as the mirror will show it. I make many a decision that I know is wrong, but I am still emotionally drawn to it. It makes no logical sense other than I’m used to this abuse and haven’t found another pathway out. I know things won’t change, but I don’t have the resources to pull away when I should.  Love is not only blind, but it’s also damn stupid at least in my mirror.

I’m angry, but nobody can know; even as everyone around me is exploding, I have to keep my cool. They can easily express how they feel, but if I do, I’m the problem.  Honesty, it’s in their book with bright colors, but mine is hidden with invisible ink, although lately I feel that ink is seeping through. While others have the certificates, I have to act like a therapist 24/7 and don’t receive any compensation for my work, but a token of peace every once in a while.  Is there anyone who will listen before I just lose it!!!

FOOTNOTE- Everyone can use a therapist, especially those who have to act like that in their daily life which is what is in my mirror now.