Monthly Archives June 2019

Don’t you wish you could be plugged in and come out 100% charged in the morning. A matter of fact I think most of us would accept a bit over 50% as the alarm rings.  Yet our phones take it for granted and that is just wrong! It’s time that they share their charge with us maybe they can  spare 10 % to our side.  A matter fact we probably all would be 100 % in the morning if we knew that we would be carried around as well. Cell Phones it’s time to give it up and share that charge for life with those who keep you running all day.

I understand and respect that nobody wants to be treated like a piece of meat but at the same time is it to quiet when whistles have been clamped out?   For if G-D has given  you the looks wouldn’t you once in awhile want to see if others really notice?  Some remarks are completely tasteless but no remarks on the other hand can make one feel very lonesome.  It’s also true that I have never had the call but let’s face it this body is of the wrong sex to deserve any meows. Maybe one whistle  every once in a while wouldn’t hurt their or even my ego after all.

For me to stay sane and productive I often have to pretend the place I’m in is an insane asylum and I’m the head psychiatrist. That means allow small bits of explosion and responding in a calm deliberate voice. It also means walking away from the bits of insanity instead of adding to them.  Trying not to take one “my patients” say personally and using the celery rule (previous post). The only problem is at the end of the day sometimes I feel like I’m the one who needs some counseling or maybe checking if this jacket actually fits.

I’m made for today! For if I was born in a different time how could I complete my multi-tasking of emailing, texting and calling at the same time? These times are built for a person such as me who doesn’t want to waste a moment as I can flick through hundreds of options in minutes. I can’t imagine how my parts would fit in a different time period but maybe it did with a few less additions (hyper drive) and subtractions (hyper drive) then I have now.

DAD-  And that’s how Santa gets down the Chimney every night. Good night honey.

SALLY- One more story, one more please dad!!!!

DAD- Well okay but this is the last one.  Once upon a time a long time ago there lived a President in 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue who was a Republican and everyone agreed was doing a swell job.

SALLY- Daddy I won’t a true story like Santa not a fairy tale!

DAD-  But it is a true story.

SALLY- Come on dad I’m not 3 years old anymore. Did MSNBC and CNN exist?

DAD– Well um…

SALLY – I’ll  just go to sleep. I think my tooth is loose and the really tooth fairy will come and give me a present. Good night dad.

DAD- Good night my too brilliant Sally.

There are different markers when someone is finally “grown up” but I’m going to use the “After 1/2 Way Point”.  This is the point where if you double your age you are older then your parents. For example if your 26 and your parents are 52 you have started this climb.  I know it’s harder if your parents start earlier and you can glide a bit if they hitched a ride a bit later but that is the reality.  It’s at this point where you suddenly have to take a bit more care of your parents then the other way around and over time that percent of time only goes up.  Growing up is hard to do but it’s a way to show that you appreciate all that your parents have done for you in the 1st half.

I was paid to watch and wear their colors by people like the one above and then by one’s who put this practice out of business for good.  For once I cheered for a team they suddenly had the power to come from any deficit even if it was the top of the 9th or with 2 minutes left in the game. It was exciting at 1st but then it became a business and like all businesses sometimes a bit mundane. Yet once that power was leaked out I became beholden to those who were the greatest supporters with $$ or those that had the most too win or lose with such an outcome. Which led to my demise when I fell asleep before the end of the game and those who invested in me decided to put an end to this game for good. The clock ticked but this time I had no effect on the outcome because I couldn’t watch for good anymore.

FOOTNOTE- I’m pretty confident I don’t have this power although this story was inspired by the come back from behind win of the Met’s over the Yankees in the 9th inning last night once my T.V. and mind was set to the game.

2nd FOOTNOTE: Found out the game was cancelled do to rain and I was just watching a game from a year ago instead. Oh well another power lost.