Monthly Archives December 2025

I’m unofficially officially a marine. For, I’ve been trained to deal with any verbal battle along the way and have survived in tact. The truth is I didn’t even know I was drafted into this war but trust me I’ve been hit by any grenade of the mouth that could come my way and am still standing proud.  Keeping cool when the sauna is burning hot is my specialty.  So today I declare I’m a marine and ready to go to any battle although in the end like all warriors I truly just seek peace.

Joshua Stone’s ” Your Place At My Place” might be a new place to park your mind. It’s a catchy song that has not been caught yet by the general public. Joshua has a great voice for this song which grabs you further as you enter. So take a different path with this song.

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This (above) could have or even should have been my spot but because of Y-O-U I’m on a whole different path. You had to put up with years of my side roads, yet through your patience and love, you pulled me back on the main tracks.  Places nobody else would step into you not only went there but dug along with me. Yes, there were moments of  “tough love” but not of abandonment and that’s what truly kept me going. So thank you even though you might never hear it my own mouth my soul knows exactly your wonderful footprints.

FOOTPRINT-  There are many that have stepped in to save a loved one when others would have walked away which would cause not only pain and suffering to them but society as a whole. They are our true hidden hero’s.

Here are some notes to avoid, address, and, if needed, end a conflict with a partner who may not know how to do so.

MIDST OF ONE

1. I won’t be spoken to like that
2. I don’t need to justify myself to you
3. The conversation is over for now; we can revisit it later.
4. That’s not the way I see it
5. That’s what I chose

ENDING OF FIGHTS

1. I’m sorry for hurting you (You did hurt them even if it wasn’t your goal in anyway)
2. I agree the subject needs to be addressed
3. Would you like to provide a solution
4. That was helpful (Even if it really wasn’t)
5. What did you hear?
6. How can we unwrap this
7. Please help me understand why you think that way
8. I’m glad we spoke about this
9. That sounds frustrating
10. So what you’re saying  (active listening)
11.  It sounds like you feel
12. I understand why you’d feel hurt
13. What made you think that way
14. Can you walk me through what happened from your side
15. I understand you feel hurt and mistrustful right now but I assure my intentions were never meant to hurt you.

PREVENTING THE BLOWUP

1. I may not fully understand your concern. Can you help me see it from your perspective?
2. I hear what you’re saying. Can you tell me more about what made you feel that way?

JEALOUSY 

1. I understand this worries you, and I want to be clear about what’s happening.
2. I love you and I’m committed to us but I also need time with friends and family to feel balanced.
3. I hear that you’re worried. Can you help me understand what’s making you feel this way right now?
4. I care for you deeply, and I also need to take care of myself
5. I understand you worry when you don’t know my plans, but I need some time alone. Sometimes, to recharge. This doesn’t mean anything is wrong between us.
6. I want to share with you, but I also need privacy about certain parts of my life, just like you do
7. I understand this is worrying you, and I care about how you feel, but I also want to focus on what is actually happening right now.
8. I hear you that sounds really tough. I’m here with you.
9.  I can see you feel upset and understand why you might feel that way. However there truly is nothing for you to worry about.
10. I have nothing to hide, and I want to assure you everything is out in the open. Let’s talk about what is making you feel unsure.

SAFE QUESTIONS

1. Can you help me understand why you might feel that way?

2. Can you help me understand the root of the fear and/or suspicion?

3. Please let me know why you thought I was untruthful?

REPEATING

1. We talked about this before and I’ve answered you honestly I love you and I’m here for you but I don’t want us to keep circling the same fear.
2. I understand that you’re feeling worried but I don’t think this conversation is going to help right now.
3. I  think we both need some time to this and cool down.  Let’s take a break and revisit the discussion when we’re both in a better place emotionally

HEALING

1. Self Care- It’s important to take care of your needs and ways to expel negative energies in a non toxic way maybe arts, exercise and prayer can play a bigger role.
2. Celebrating small wins ” I’m proud of…”
3. Showing empathy without judgement
4. Listening without distraction
5.  Small hobbies
6. Share a light personal detail and invite them to share as well.
7.  Ask if there in the mood for a deeper conversation.
8. Small gestures maybe felt deeper then bigger acts (light touch, simple message “I’m here for you, you matter to me”
9. Thank you for sharing your truth
10. How can I help you feel more secure in our relationship going forward>
11. What would you need from me to feel reassured?

THERAPY

1. I think you deserve a place where you can talk freely without judgement
2. A counselor could give you the tools to make stressful events a bit less so.

Rob Reiner & Michele’s Reiner untimely death is a tragedy that should never have occurred yet I wonder if betrayal to his own mirror might have been an accomplice. Here below are some of the reasons one might ask such a question.

(1) OPEN BORDERS- The policy of open borders allowed the poison to seep into this country and into his son’s own hands.

(2) LENIENT POLICIES ON DRUG ENFORCEMENT- Policies that make it harder to force treatment on those with drug problems might have resulted in his son not getting the care he truly needed.

(3)  TOUGH GUN LAWS- If he believed in the 2nd amendment in his personal life it could have been the force that stopped his son before he actually was ready to act.

The vile that came to a peaceful Hanukkah celebration is Australia is beyond comprehension because of the monsters that performed such heinous acts. Imagine the one goal we expect all fathers to have is their sons and daughters live peaceful productive life’s is nothing in this monsters playbook. Not only did he go out and perpetrate such an act of horror but recruited his own son to be a part of it. How much hate must be in one’s heart to act in such a way?  No animal would act in such a despicable way but radical hateful people can why?

I finally can be who I want to be, and you’ll never know, well at least until you have your last drink. I’m not going to push the envelope too far, but how would you actually know who my “cousin is, or what movie I’m preparing to star in that is pre-pre-production anyway? Yes, I wrote that song you’ve been listening to, and the credit was stolen away, so you won’t be able to read about it. I was the one who brought in the key information to get….  The truth might not be at the bar, but a good story sure will be there, and I plan to be the author.  Oh, it’s a best seller, of course.

I probably shouldn’t have but who are you to judge when you haven’t put on even one of my shoes yet alone walked? Don’t worry this isn’t one that any papers will come from except one from a hospital bed. The reason I shouldn’t have has nothing to do with a priest or rabbi but one of my own head. For, she was the enemy only a few hours ago and then a new version came out that tempted my better self. It was incredible but painful after and the truth is she has me in a spell that will probably having me going down this path again. It’s one I swore I could resist until resistance was futile. Not your typical affair by anyone’s definition but that is the one my life is based on.

FOOTNOTE-  Sometimes the one your under the covers with is a different person when the covers are taken away.

I’m planning to start  new “Tick Tok/Instagram” posts called “Rebel Dad”. This will be an advise column for new dads and those whose father is absent from their picture for whatever reason. I’m formulating this column based on 30 years of experience in the field which often I wish I had told the younger version of myself.  Yes, I’m still a work in progress yet I haven’t took a day off from learning since the day at the hospital. G-D willing I can impart some knowledge which will make your own journeys less treacherous and more F-U-N along the way called life.

For those that believe age is just a number “Senior Housing?” will be the place for them to reside. This is a place where one lives the life of a young person even as their parts might not feel that way. Calm music will not be played during activities as those attending will rock the night until they can’t. Yes, there will be senior dispensing of medicine but just as many happy hours.  So if you truly want your golden years to be golden “Senior Housing?” will be the place to stay. WARNING this isn’t for one to count the years but live them!!!

FOOTNOTE-  Warning  Granny might not want you to attend.