It’s truly sad you honestly believe that many a knife is ready to be plunged into your back whenever a disagreement occurs. It’s not as if someone can have a strong opposing view or do something off your beaten path they must be looking to throw you on the 3rd rail. People are flawed and you only accept them when they 100 % accept Y-O-U. These individuals aren’t hot or cold but freezing and scalding. Every act in the past adds up in you and formulates into that imaginary knife. Maybe that’s why your friend list continues to change like a shuffle of cards. It’s a sad way to look at the world around you and I’m truly sorry that the knife get’s clouded in every view.