Insane Asylum

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How do you know that you're not insane?  

For me to stay sane and productive I often have to pretend the place I’m in is an insane asylum and I’m the head psychiatrist. That means allow small bits of explosion and responding in a calm deliberate voice. It also means walking away from the bits of insanity instead of adding to them.  Trying not to take one “my patients” say personally and using the celery rule (previous post). The only problem is at the end of the day sometimes I feel like I’m the one who needs some counseling or maybe checking if this jacket actually fits.

Made For Today

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I’m made for today! For if I was born in a different time how could I complete my multi-tasking of emailing, texting and calling at the same time? These times are built for a person such as me who doesn’t want to waste a moment as I can flick through hundreds of options in minutes. I can’t imagine how my parts would fit in a different time period but maybe it did with a few less additions (hyper drive) and subtractions (hyper drive) then I have now.

Once Upon A Time

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DAD-  And that’s how Santa gets down the Chimney every night. Good night honey.

SALLY- One more story, one more please dad!!!!

DAD- Well okay but this is the last one.  Once upon a time a long time ago there lived a President in 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue who was a Republican and everyone agreed was doing a swell job.

SALLY- Daddy I won’t a true story like Santa not a fairy tale!

DAD-  But it is a true story.

SALLY- Come on dad I’m not 3 years old anymore. Did MSNBC and CNN exist?

DAD– Well um…

SALLY – I’ll  just go to sleep. I think my tooth is loose and the really tooth fairy will come and give me a present. Good night dad.

DAD- Good night my too brilliant Sally.


Growing Up

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There are different markers when someone is finally “grown up” but I’m going to use the “After 1/2 Way Point”.  This is the point where if you double your age you are older then your parents. For example if your 26 and your parents are 52 you have started this climb.  I know it’s harder if your parents start earlier and you can glide a bit if they hitched a ride a bit later but that is the reality.  It’s at this point where you suddenly have to take a bit more care of your parents then the other way around and over time that percent of time only goes up.  Growing up is hard to do but it’s a way to show that you appreciate all that your parents have done for you in the 1st half.


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I was paid to watch and wear their colors by people like the one above and then by one’s who put this practice out of business for good.  For once I cheered for a team they suddenly had the power to come from any deficit even if it was the top of the 9th or with 2 minutes left in the game. It was exciting at 1st but then it became a business and like all businesses sometimes a bit mundane. Yet once that power was leaked out I became beholden to those who were the greatest supporters with $$ or those that had the most too win or lose with such an outcome. Which led to my demise when I fell asleep before the end of the game and those who invested in me decided to put an end to this game for good. The clock ticked but this time I had no effect on the outcome because I couldn’t watch for good anymore.

FOOTNOTE- I’m pretty confident I don’t have this power although this story was inspired by the come back from behind win of the Met’s over the Yankees in the 9th inning last night once my T.V. and mind was set to the game.

2nd FOOTNOTE: Found out the game was cancelled do to rain and I was just watching a game from a year ago instead. Oh well another power lost.

Anti-Stalker Spray

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Let’s face it when these little critters come walking one’s path even the biggest, baddest wolf will give them space. The “Anti Stalker Spray” works the same making sure that those who actively want to stay close are snuffed away.  This spray will come in all different aroma’s such as Skunk, B.O, Morning Breathe etc and will insure you will have your space  where-ever you might go.  Anti Stalker Spray because sometimes you have to stink to stay safe.

Why Actors Lean Left

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Why do “successful” actors/actresses lean left?  Here are some of the reasons (below) this mindset is set in and how it might take a different performance.

(1) IN-  To continue to be accepted by your peers ” you must fit in” and with all the cocktail parties and events the discussions leans to the left. Of course if there were parties that pushed deeper conversations then that might change.

(2) EMOTIONS- Acting requires one to look  dwell deep into a characters emotional state and up to now those sympathies lead to those less fortunate with the lefts lenses. Yet with Pro-Life and Faith based films doing well in the box office that lens might have to get enlarged.

(3) GUILT- As a successful actor moves up their corporate ladder many heads have been stepped on along the way making that individual project their emotional state on others. Maybe a bit more therapy would help rather then trying to guilt trip us all instead.

(4) NEED- There are quite a few actors who have crossed into the Weinstein world and they need the liberal package to cleanse them of their wrong doing.  It’s the easiest get free pass one can find.  Maybe we need to clean these actors out of the business instead or at least admit to their wrong doing instead.


Want To Pay

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I love $$ but I love good service even more.  Therefore it is my honor to pay those who provide such professional care especially if they have an honest smile during said work.  For I want to keep this attitude going not just with me but others that might encounter such talent.  Actions speaks louder then words and here are just few examples (below) where I happy to let that action occur with a Washington, Jackson or even a Benjamin or two.

(1) ABOVE THE CALL- A professional who is not looking to cut along the line but will make many other cuts to make sure I’m truly satisfied.

(2) CARE- When someone shows that their concerned not just with a few words but an attitude that puts them on the team.

(3) SKIN IN THE GAME- If your willing to play the game even if it’s with a smaller ball then you’ve ever hit with then I’m happy to provide you with a home run once the G-D willing hits start happening.

(4) UNEXPECTED- It’s always nice to give to those who truly least expect you to do so.


Let Us Decide

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The government should take care of insuring the ten or so basic needs of government are fulfilled and then leave the rest to US!   For example nationally our monies would cover national defense, basic infrastructure, helping those who have fallen through the cracks and  seven more etc. Then we would vote on our tax forms where we want the rest of our individual $$’s to go to. Furthermore instead of going to a governmental agency those $$’s would go to an charity with a record (A+ Rating Charity Navigator) of accomplishing said goals. This way the people would see the change they want without the government taking their cut of the transaction.  If those changes didn’t occur then individuals wouldn’t blame some big government bureaucracy but the work of said charity and make modifications to see  that this actually doesn’t happen again.  Let the people decide and victory will truly be ours!

Shavuot- Just A Different Road

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I will never tell those individuals who observe the traditional two day observance of holidays such as Shavuot that they are incorrect I just believe that two or three paths are also correct. Whether my 1 ish day of observance puts me on a path that is a bit more bumpy only G-D knows (literally) I just believe that if they observe 1 day sorta in Israel  for this holiday then that’s fine with me. For G-D knows what I can do in the 2nd day and since my days here on earth are short shouldn’t I keep the clock running instead of putting it on stop watch mode? Furthermore by taking a 2nd day off  I would be making it more difficult for loved one’s and liked one’s so I’m sure G-D will put that in my equation.  My traditional brothers  and sisters are correct because they are doing what they believe G-D wants of them and I’m correct as well because I believe the same plus add the human element just in case I need  the extra credit.